Simon's Parents

From time-to-time, in polite conversation, idle curiosity, or formal inquiry I am asked about my parents. I was raised to the age of eight by a pastry chef in Avalon. He was not my father nor any relative of mine to my knowledge, but was kind enough to take in an orphaned child. Do I remember my parents? I always answer no to that question though that is not entirely true. It's said that in our nightmares we remember our birth and that when we wake, in a cold sweat dripping with fear, the memory is gone. It slips away to allow us to feel some sense of comfort in life. In that same fashion, my memory of my parents too has left my waking mind, for the most part, leaving only bits of nightmare to cling to.

I can see my mother and father gazing down on their child. They wear simple and yet disturbing ivory masks which leave only their eyes visible. The eyes are not filled with emotion; no love or anger or even pity. Those eyes look at me with apathy as my mother and father in turn speak to me. I was too young to understand what they said, but the message still haunts me.

Was it hard for my parents to abandon me? Was there some terrible event which forced them to send me away? I don't believe so. I feel that it was just a Random act, in a way as amoral as an act of nature. I do not blame them for what they have done, but that hasn't kept it from scaring me.

Since arriving in Amber I have almost certainly found my real father. Bleys claims that he is my father, and the resemblence in looks as well as character is uncanny. Stangely, when I first introduced him to my flickering memory of my parents he did not react. I don't think he recognized it.

That brings me to the question of who my mother is. I believe that she is Jasra. I know that my mother must be of strong Chaos blood, since I was able to pass through the barrier at Ygg. It was Luke, possibly my half-brother, who pointed out that his mother, Jasra, has red eyes much like mine. Furthermore, Bleys has confirmed that that he had sexual relations with Jasra, which were not under the best of terms. How will Jasra react to me? I can only hope for the best.

In my second night in Amber the dream of the masks reoccured, but this time it was different. The figures removed their masks and the dream took on a more malevolent aspect. One of the figures was Bleys and the other was Fiona. They were laughing evilly. Quite disturbing to the very young child I was in the dream. What would Fiona have to do with my birth? I think it's better to discard the whole notion and chalk it up to malicious tampering with the Dreamline.