I guess the road test symbolizes my mom's drive towards independence and the changes between my parents' relationship in the US. In the photo of their wedding day they stood side by side, but their status within the family was different.... In Vietnamese tradition males dominate the social order. Fathers were, without question, the full authority on all matters inside the family and mothers were to play a subservient role. My parents were married 10 years before coming to America. Back in Vietnam, my dad says, "your mom will never argue against me even though I might be wrong...but now in America, she can have her say and i have to accept it. There is still mutual respect, but not the type of obedience in Vietnam."

My mom was always capable and independent because she had to take care of eight other brothers and sisters inaddition to selling meat in the market. In general my mom says,"Vietnamese women [in America] have to take on more responsibilities than in Vietnam, but the men also change too. Your father now helps out with the housework. Back in Vietnam the men would never do that." Looking at their wedding picture so happy and beautiful, I wonder if in their wildest dreams they knew how thier life would change, and how far they would be from home just ten years later...