AmberCon North 1999 Quotes

"Cross and Double-Cross" by David de Jong

Cast of Characters

 ?:Chaosian student

"Is his wound wriggling and biting my hand or anything?" -- Simone Cooper to ?

"You collapse. You're wait, you're in terrible pain but you're aware of it. That's worse." -- GM to ?

"Bleys jumps into the Jewel." -- GM to ?, trying to say, "Random jumps into the pool."

"The Doomsday Jewel" by Sol Foster

Cast of Characters

 Val Condor:Berit, son of Random and Vialle
 Anne Delekta:Sín, daughter of Benedict
 Kris Fazzari:Melanie, daughter of Brand
 Julia Frizzell:Moira, Crown Princess of Rebma, acknowledged daughter of Moire
 Kevin Liston:Benjamin, rumored son of Corwin
 Wendi Strang-Frost:Vivienne, rumored daughter or sister of Bleys

"Instead of salt and pepper hair, (Moira) has green and black hair." -- Julia Frizzell to the group
"That would be kelp and pepper." -- GM

"All the buildings are shifting around, growing and moving." -- GM to the group
"Look, that one looks like a cat." -- Julia Frizzell

"There's this young, romantic hero-type standing there...he kind of looks like Brand." -- GM to the group
"Wait, you said he looked heroic, right?" -- Kris Fazzari

"We need a cover story." -- Benjamin
"What's wrong with the truth?" -- Vivienne
<all the other Amberites burst out laughing>

"I can use you as a human shield." -- Berit
"You have testicles, I have a knee." -- Vivienne

"If it had hit him, it would have exploded." -- Vivienne
"It did hit him." -- Orla
"It was a dud!" -- Vivienne

"I don't believe we've met." -- Melanie
"I've forgotten my name." -- Orla

"It probably would be a bad thing to try and kill Orla right now. I think I'll do it." -- Benjamin to GM

"(Orla) does successfully lop off a limb." -- GM
"Yeah, this is probably going to hurt." -- Benjamin

"I'm saying demon, but I'm using that loosely." -- GM to Kris Fazzari

"Your Jedi mind tricks will not work on me." -- Kris Fazzari, speaking for the demon
"I have no brain." -- Anne Delekta

"If I have to actually touch (the demon), I will, but ewwwww!!!!!" -- Moira to GM

"OK, you with the umbrella, you try it!" -- Moira to Melanie

"I come from the cure." -- Benjamin to Orla

"(The Chaosites) have dick." -- Benjamin
"Who is Dick?" -- Melanie

"Do you swear not to interfere with the cure?" -- Orla
"Yes." -- everyone except for Sín
"Yes. What did I just swear to?" -- Sín

"Hi Great-grandfather, we have to rescue you so you can draw the Pattern and fuck the Unicorn, so we can be born." -- Kris Fazzari to the group, on what the rescue party should say to Dworkin

"I'll depress (the demon's) Chi, slowly." -- Berit
"I'm going to depress his skull." -- Benjamin

"We're trying to bring Dworkin out of some dark prison thing." -- Moira to Sín
"Unfortunately, he's going at Mach 2." -- Kevin Liston

"Benjamin's trying to be undense." -- Julia Frizzell
"It's very hard for Benjamin to be undense." -- Kevin Liston

"We have nothing to beat up, therefore we babble." -- Vivienne to the group

"Gee, I wonder if people from our future will come back to fix what we've done?" -- Vivienne
"We'll kill them too." -- Benjamin

"I hate snakes, you're going to have to go with the Unicorn." -- Vivienne to Benjamin

"No man can draw a Pattern with a yo-yo and stay sane." -- Anne Delekta to the group

"I do the hairball thing and cough up (the Jewel)." -- Sín
"The Unicorn looks disgusted." -- GM
"You're one to talk." -- Benjamin to the Unicorn

"Chaos High: Logrus 101" by Anne Delekta

Cast of Characters

 Heather Barker:Aurora, AKA Rusty
 Simone Cooper:Nero of Sawall
 Anne Devlin:Deeva
 Lou Evans:Kal
 Sol Foster:Fingal
 Julia Frizzell:Kadia
 Mark Richardson:Derek
 Edwin Voskamp:Thanos

"Are you a greensky person?" -- Anne Devlin
"I'm more of a purplesky person." -- Lou Evans

"That is so 12 turnings ago." -- Kal to ?

"We're actually just taking the Logrus to stretch our allowances." -- Lou Evans to ?

"We've discovered the one true public servant." -- Kal to the group, on Miss Pennyloafer

"I have the sparkly rope of evil!" -- Lou to ?, on Thanos' "magical" rope

"Using my keenly developed artistic sense..." -- Kal to ?
"No! Knock him unconscious now!" -- Simone Cooper

"Becoming terminally Zen, I follow the string that isn't there." -- Kal to ?

"I take my Sawall hanky out and clean my sword." -- Nero to ?

"This must be the facing the fear part." -- Nero
"I have a strong fear of stock footage..." -- Lou Evans

"We have to pour a cup of burning water over our heads." -- Nero
"You first." -- Kadia

"We're you looking at my class notes?" -- Suhuy
"No." -- Kal
<Suhuy turns to Derek>
"Derek puts his head back into the Font." -- Mark Richardson

"Nine Princes in High School" by Ron Kreiger

Cast of Characters

 Sean Dorsey:Gérard
 Kris Fazzari:Fiona
 Rick Garman:Brand
 Chris Hearns:Julian
 Anton North:Bleys
 Michael Schloss:Caine
 Jim Smith:Corwin

"Vote for Brand, he's the only one left alive." -- Jim Smith to the group

"Hall monitor! Hall monitor!" -- Julian
"Merlin shows up." -- GM

"Now we know why Julian has such a low party score. He's neglected the key element of throwing a party - inviting people." -- Jim Smith

"This is the Weather the Cuckoo Likes" by Ron Kreiger

Cast of Characters

 Simone Cooper:D&D character
 Joe Saul:?
 Michael Schloss:Colonel Mustard
 Anne ?:?

"Where are you Colonel Mustard?" -- GM
"I'm in the Library." -- Colonel Mustard
"People are calling to you, 'Colonel Mustard, we know you killed Mr. Body in with the lead pipe in the conservatory!'" -- GM
"I duck into the secret passage" -- Colonel Mustard

"Are you wearing anything else but the shackles? I want my imagination to run..." -- Zephram to Illana, a buxom D&D character

"Remember, you guys are D&D characters, so when you enter the inn you recognize each other as Player Characters." -- Joe Saul to ?

"You could play the Bishop. No, not the comic character, the chess piece. But you can only move on oblique angles." -- ?

"Or you could play the Knight, and leap over Michelle to land on the table" -- Joe Saul to ?

"...and the world goes fuzzy." -- GM
"You mean that's not normal?" -- Anne
"It is if you're in a Werewolf game" -- Joe Saul

"This is the Cell, Colonel Mustard. You have the automatic ability to know what room this is. You see the word 'Cell' in big letters on the floor." -- GM to Colonel Mustard

"Three D&D characters fall ten feet from the ceiling, and take 1D6 damage each. But since this is a diceless game, they all take 3 hit points." -- GM to ?

"My new game is Swords and Cigarettes. I'm illiterate, so it's S&S." -- Simone Cooper to ?

"Mandor comes through." -- GM
"Ah, Mr. Silver." -- Colonel Mustard

"Hey, we must be between adventures because we're getting experience." -- Simone Cooper to ?

"You notice that something happens on a Celestial level when Colonel Mustard opens the secret door." -- GM to Zephram, an In Nomine character

"If you're really Mandor, show us your balls." -- Joe Saul to ?

"Where's the farthest part of the castle?" -- Zephram
"20 squares that way." -- Colonel Mustard, pointing

"Rinaldo has the Merlin card, so Merlin didn't do it." -- Colonel Mustard to ?, as Rinaldo Trumps Merlin

"Can I set Luke's chest hair on fire?" -- Joe Saul to ?

"Where's Ghostwheel?" -- Colonel Mustard
"He's in the Trump Room, which is next to all other rooms." -- GM

"Colonel, you know that the Captain just entered the Jewel Room." -- GM to Colonel Mustard, after the Captain projected his mind into the Jewel of Judgement to attune himself

"Colonel Mustard, you start walking the Pattern, but when you get to a curve you realize that you can only walk in straight lines, so you fry." -- GM to Colonel Mustard

"Time Is Relative" by Rae Williams

Cast of Characters

 Alan Glover:Finbar
 Mark MacKinnon:Laertes
 R.F. McCaughey:Doromay
 Anton North:?

"Where did these children come from?" -- Nicole
"Um, I'm not about to tell you about the birds and the bees, ma'am..." -- servant

"Where is the King?" -- Doromay
"Unless someone deposed me recently, I am." -- Dworkin
"Wow! You really look like that?" -- Doromay

"I figure the least we can do is to mess up their lives, so they'll be pissed off when they get back." -- Doromay to ?

"What have I been teaching her?" -- Finbar
"The same things you were learning when you became a magician." -- GM
"...I'm going back to the party." -- Finbar, looking worried

"Oh my God, the Pattern ate your brain!" -- Doromay to ?

"Does (Bleys' room) smell like myrrh?" -- Althea
"No, it smells like dirty sweat socks." -- GM

"I know lots of stuff! Ask me.... No, don't ask me...." -- Doromay to ?

"Yeah, I know your version of nice, Dad." -- Fiona to Armand

"You're going to change the guards? They've got spears." -- GM
"Not a problem!" -- Anton North
"You've got a shield. 'Here, old man, just don't bleed on the Pattern...'" -- Mark MacKinnon

"Heal yourself, old man! You're not helpless, you know!" -- Armand to Oberon

"Brothers and sisters! Stop what you're doing! Don't destroy Amber!" -- Laertes
"Why not!" -- Doromay

"Are you sure Dworkin's not moving? Doromay goes over and kicks him in the balls." -- R.F. McCaughey to GM

"The King Is Dead" by Julia Frizzell

Cast of Characters

 Michael Curry:Selwin, son of Oberon
 Kris Fazzari:Lydea, daughter of Sebastian, granddaughter of Oberon
 Sol Foster:Alexander, son of Fiona
 Guy Gascoigne-Piggford:Brennan, son of Bleys
 Jeff Mackintosh:Ardath, daughter of Alaina, granddaughter of Oberon
 Rae Williams:Adrienne, daughter of Cybele, rumored daughter of Benedict

"Listen, you'd better be there when we come to kill you, or we're going to be very put out." -- Selwin to Adrienne

"It was a pointless game." -- Guy Gascoigne-Piggford
"Well, so are most Amber games, it's a pointless system." -- Rae Williams

"Why would you choose an heir who can't walk the Pattern?" -- Brennan
"She can." -- Benedict
"Oh right, she can. Never mind, I'll go back to sleep." -- Brennan

"Quips and Bounds" by Wendi Strang-Frost

Cast of Characters

 Alan Glover:Arthur
 Eric Minton:Quentin
 Mike ?:?
 Ron ?:Gonzalo/Gonzo
 Will ?:?

"(Gonzalo) sometimes stays in Amber, because when you go on an LSD trip in Amber, you don't go anywhere!" -- Ron ? to ?

"But does (Arthur) know how to party?" -- Ron ?
"You'll have to find out." -- Alan Glover
"That would be 'no.'" -- Ron ?

"I want my thumbs back!" -- Quentin to ?

"I must put on my mask. But it's too big, and I have no opposable thumbs!" -- Quentin to ?

"Power, can I speak?" -- Quentin to ?

"You still look like a fairy." -- GM
"Yeah, but we always knew that." -- Ron ?
"Ooh! What a way to be outed!" -- GM

"If only he were dead...but you can fix that!" -- Ron ?

"And where is Milord?" -- Servant
"He's...busy." -- Jerichina
"And who are you?" -- Servant
"His...friend." -- Jerichina

"I will go to...I don't know, I've never tried to get women's clothes in the castle before." -- Mike ? to ?

"You see a corpse...carrying a bunny." -- GM to ?

"Well, I'm off to get clothes. Bye!" -- Jerichina to ?

"I can deal with Marilyn Monroe." -- Ron ?
"In your current form, you can't." -- GM

"I don't care if I'm three feet tall, Keimo shouldn't be able to kick my ass!" -- Gonzo
"He's three feet tall? Lucky guy!" -- Will ?, the six inch tall fairy

"I was on LSD when I fixed the Jewel. At the time, I didn't think it would make much difference..." -- ?

"As far as I'm concerned, (Gonzo's) a fairy. Then again, he always was." -- Ron ? to ?

"...then I did something irrelevant, and then the grenade went off..." -- Edwin to ?

"I want to try an experiment...not that kind of thing, a different kind of experiment." -- Gonzo to ?

"I don't even think Flora is Flora, because if Flora was Flora, then Flora would be someone else." -- Gonzo to ?

"Use the purple, you fool!" -- Quentin to ?

"They don't let Gonzo use the right kind of gunpowder to work in Amber!" -- Ron ? to ?

"How'd you like to catch a grenade in the back of the head?" -- GM to ?

"Someone's Trumping grenades in here, which is a bad thing!" -- Edwin to ?

"Everybody, clasp hands!" -- Gonzo
"I don't have any hands!" -- Quentin

"I am not normally a rabbit!" -- Quentin to ?

"Quentin, can you tell if the throne room is warded magically?" -- Gonzo
"Bring me a live animal and a sharp knife." -- Quentin
"You are a live animal." -- Jericho

"The Pattern is awfully long for someone who's eight inches tall." -- Jericho to ?

"Random and the seven demonic dwarves?" -- Jericho to ?

"Would you like me to rot his arms and legs off?" -- Quentin
"I don't think Random will like that." -- Jericho

"There are some demons I don't like. Will you beat them up for me?" -- Jericho to ?

"I super-soaked Random! Yes!" -- Ron ? to ?

"I peer into the depths of the blood pudding." -- Quentin to ?

"What's the invisible rope of flesh doing?" -- Quentin to ?

"It's a shame I don't have power word 'clot.'" -- Quentin to ?

"Random's not himself" -- Flora
"No, Random's not possessed anymore, Gonzo's possessed, only Gonzo's not Gonzo, Gonzo's a halfling." -- Jericho

"What is this, psychic Lamaze? Push, push, push!" -- Quentin to ?

"The bunny's already been spitted. Can we start a fire?" -- Jericho to ?, after Quentin is hit by a crossbow bolt

"Rabbit has been shot!" -- Alan
"It's bunnicide." -- Mike

"Damn it, I'm not dead!" -- Ron ? to ?

"Old Soldiers" by Joe Saul, Simone Cooper, David de Jong and David Golden

Cast of Characters

 Ron Kreiger:Rinaldo
 Mark MacKinnon:Osiris Hendrake
 Eric Minton:Merlin
 Jim Smith:Algor, a Hendrake General

"I have a bad feeling, because I'm about to do something stupid." -- Algor to ?

"(Dara's) handled all of the General's blades..." -- GM Simone to ?

"Four Chaosians willing to strike against Amber, now that it is weak." -- Osiris to ?

"Chaos Demon Power, Make Up!" -- Mark MacKinnon to ?

"Is there any vital organ that's not Jewel-shaped?" -- Jim Smith to ?

"Yeah, go by without a Father's Day card.... Now it's, 'Hey Dad, can I borrow your Pattern?" -- Jim Smith to ?

"You are aware that the hatred of thousands of Hendrakes behind you is directed at you." -- GM Dave Golden
"Kiss my big, red ass." -- Osiris

"We're not Stretch Armstrong here..." -- Mark MacKinnon to ?

"Cut away everything that doesn't look like the eye of the Serpent." -- Rinaldo to ?

"I want to look at this Abyss block of Pillsbury dough." -- Algor to ?

"If you say something like, 'Be true to yourself,' or some crap like that, I'm going to kick your ass." -- Merlin to Suhuy

"So, is there anything useful you can tell me?" -- Merlin
"No." -- Suhuy
"So, is there any point to this conversation?" -- Merlin

"If there's anything I can do for you, let me know." -- Fiona
"I'll remember that." -- Merlin

"So how much do you get for selling out your friends?" -- Luke
"What?" -- Merlin

"But everybody's going to break that part of the treaty, and we know that everyone's going to break that part of the treaty, so what are the consequences of everybody breaking that part of the treaty?" -- Merlin to ?

"Your Dad's having second thoughts about selling you to the Amberites." -- Luke to Ghostwheel
"I am not planning to sell Ghost to the Amberites!" -- Merlin

"Maybe you should make Jasra your Chancellor!" -- Merlin to Random

"Has Oberon arrived?" -- Luke
"Oberon is dead." -- Algor
"The other Oberon." -- Luke
"It's a common name?" -- Algor

"I cast my 'analyze contract' spell." -- Luke to Oberon, the King of the Seelie Court

"Dad, you want me to destroy Faerie for you?" -- Ghost
"No, Ghostwheel! Down, Ghostwheel! Nooo!" -- Merlin

"I guess I have to withdraw from Benedict's orifices. He's lucky." -- Osiris to ?

"The Enemy Within" by Mark Richardson

Cast of Characters

 Kris Fazzari:Llewella
 Guy Gascoigne-Piggford:Bleys
 Alan Glover:Random
 Bill Gulstad:Gérard
 Anton North:Benedict
 Rae Williams:Julian

"I draw my sword and run in." -- Gérard to GM
"Aren't you more comfortable with a table or a chair?" -- Anton North
"Yeah, but there aren't many forests in the Pattern room." -- Guy Gascoigne-Piggford

"Can I tackle him?" -- Bleys
"You tackle the Pattern." -- GM

"That's a pretty damn hard punch. Reality just hit you." -- GM to Bleys

"I knee the Pattern in the center of the universe." -- Bleys to GM

"It's that Monday morning feeling - the universe hates you." -- Bleys to the group, while fighting the Pattern

"Children of the Horn" by Sean Frost

Cast of Characters

 Val Condor:Dalt
 Mark MacKinnon:Random
 Anton North:?
 Michael Schloss:Julian, Sand
 Wendi Strang-Frost:Mirelle

"Why do you think Random's practicing the drums? He's getting some wrist action practice." -- Anton North to the group

"Is there a fountain or a horse trough that I can wash myself in?" -- Mirelle to GM, after being shoved down the garderobe

"Julian tried to give me a hicky and shoved me in the potty, and the Begmans are in on it. -- Mirelle to ?

"The back of my boxer shorts says 'Random,' but when I walk it says 'Raom'." -- Random to ?

"Julian's pissed because he can't see himself in the mirror anymore." -- Michael Schloss to the group, after Julian is turned into a vampire

"As you bite (Mirelle), you notice that she doesn't really have any blood" -- GM
"What?!?" -- Julian

"Julian tried to bite my neck, so I shoved my drumstick up his ass." -- Random to ?

"I'm going to get a spanking 'cuz I killed Julian!" -- Random to ?

"What does the dust that used to be Julian smell like?" -- Anton North
"Roses" -- Michael Schloss

"It's a particularly immaculate pile of dust." -- GM to the group, about Julian's remains

"Julian, all you are is dust in the wind." -- GM to Julian

"As you bite (Mirelle), you notice that she doesn't have any blood" -- GM
"What?!?" -- Random

"Stupid Caine, vampires don't exist." -- Gérard to Caine

"Oh my god! If these are White Wolf vampires we're all doomed. He's Caine!" -- Michael Schloss to the group

"Is there any way I can break (Mirelle) over a chair?" -- Gérard to ?

"I actually got to die this time. I do appreciate that." -- Mark MacKinnon to ?

"I go to some really cool gothic part of the castle that the vampires are probably hanging out at." -- Sand, a goth, to GM

"Can I tell you how ridiculous it is for Oberon to be looking up at his 11 year old daughter?" -- GM (6'2") to a standing Michael Schloss (6'3")

"Mortus Interruptus!" -- Wendi Strang-Frost to ?, after another character's death was interrupted

"Silence and Silver" by Simone Cooper and David Golden

Cast of Characters

 David de Jong:Corwin
 Kris Fazzari:Fiona
 Julia Frizzell:Deirdre
 Rick Garman:Caine2
 Guy Gascoigne-Piggford:Gérard
 R.F. McCaughey:Bleys
 Eric Minton:Brand
 Tony Pi:Caine1
 Tymen Van Dyk:Benedict
 Edwin Voskamp:Random

"It appears we have to broaden Corwin's mind." -- Fiona
"It's good that we appear to have an eternity." -- Brand

"I have to go." -- Corwin
"You have leave to depart." -- Brand

"You have no power over me." -- Gérard to Brand
"Brand waves his hands. You're in the dungeon." -- Kris Fazzari
"My, I certainly misjudged that one." -- Gérard

"Oh, I was hoping no one would notice I didn't learn anything. Wait, I did learn something. Don't mind-ream Droppa." -- Caine2 to the group

"Would you stop embarrassing us?" -- Caine1 to Caine2

"If Caine can't trust himself, who can he trust?" -- GM
"Yes, but Caine can't trust himself." -- Kris Fazzari

"If you chop off Brand's legs, he'll be stumpy for a few centuries, but then they'll grow back." -- Guy Gascoigne-Piggford to the group

"And at the end of the game, (Brand) had a full deck." -- Eric Minton
"For the first time ever." -- GM Simone Cooper

"All the Lies That Are My Life" by Jesse Scoble and Mark MacKinnon

Cast of Characters

 Michael Schloss:Julian

"How close am I to the Abyss?" -- Julian
"As close as you'd like to be." -- GM Jesse

"Blaze of Glory: Three Fathoms Down" by Sol Foster

Cast of Characters

 Anne Devlin:Marian Ravenwood
 Kris Fazzari:Lorianne, AKA "The Pirate Queen"
 Joe Filippini:Otto Fromm
 Julia Frizzell:Eloise St. Vire, Marchioness de Blanche
 Sean Frost:Rámon
 Kendra Jamieson:Ester
 Wendi Strang-Frost:Eddie

"I'm playing Lorianne, the Pirate Queen." -- Kris Fazzari
"Who were your parents, Mr. and Mrs. Pirate Queen?" -- Sean Frost

"Who's your character?" -- Julia Frizzell
"Otto Fromm." -- Joe Filippini
"From where?" -- Julia Frizzell

"I am Rámon. I am the greatest lover of women and the 2nd greatest swordsman of all the Spanish Main. I made love to the wife of the greatest swordsman of all the Spanish Main. That is why I am here." -- Rámon to the group

"Can I check out the Cornwall equivalent of Radio Shack before we leave?" -- Eddie to GM

"Why don't you keelhaul (Rámon)?" -- Otto
"Because the ship isn't at sea. It works much better if the ship is moving." -- Lorianne

"I said I was the second best swordsman on the Spanish Main." -- Rámon
"That statement is still accurate, since we're not on the Spanish Main." -- Lorianne
"We're not very good fighters on the Spanish Main." -- Rámon

"There's some things you can do that (Lorianne) can't even attempt, but all the things you brag about she can kick your ass in." -- GM to Rámon

"Is (the ship) going to be carrying brandy?" -- Marion
"Brandy, Roxanne, anyone who wants to come along." -- Rámon

"I am the best male swordfighter among the two of us." -- Rámon to the group, referring to himself and Lorianne

"I think I'll go on the ship captained by the person who didn't get thrown overboard." -- Eloise St. Vire to the group

"That's Rámon, a refreshing dip." -- Sean Frost to the group, after Rámon is tossed overboard by Lorianne

"Just think, other people are playing serious games right now." -- Julia Frizzell to the group

"We can use a catapult to launch the planes." -- Wendi Strang-Frost
"And, it could also be used to launch other things." -- Julia Frizzell
"Like the second best fighter." -- Kendra Jamieson

"While you're at it, why don't you invent a personal flying device?" -- Lorianne to Eddie
"Yeah, like a personal Icarus kind of setup. Don't fly too high." -- Ester

"Can you tech guys modify the merchant ship so that there's some way to defend yourself?" -- Lorianne
"Like filling the hold with soldiers?" -- Eddie

"We're going to test the 'other' setting of the catapult first, before we test the 'plane' setting. And if the 'plane' setting fails, we'll test the 'other' setting again, with Eddie." -- Lorianne to GM
"I think I will start working on that personal flying device, then." -- Eddie

"Could I hire you to make me look good?" -- Rámon to Otto
"I think that's beyond even Otto's skill." -- Kris Fazzari

"It's the automatic spanking device." -- GM to the group, referring to uses for a failed catapult

"Can you swim?" -- Ester
"Of course. I can look like someone who's drowning, though." -- Otto

"Stop, I can't keep up!" -- Kris Fazzari, multiple times, as she tries to keep up with the quotes

"OK, so you guys are sailing off. Captain?" -- GM
"Yes?" -- Lorianne
"No, no, I'm talking to the pathetic Captain." -- GM

"I think that when you fill the hold with soldiers, some of them should be Jayne's Sharks. This is their kind of mission." -- Kris Fazzari
"So, you think we're going to die." -- Sean Frost

"I think on this mission, (Jayne's men) are more like chum than sharks." -- Sean Frost

"Maybe we throw a lavish funeral for them." -- Joe Filippini, speculating on what the Sharks' promised lavish reward is
"That's what they have instead of a pension plan." -- Anne Devlin

"I could always set the merchant ship on fire, so it would be no use to (the pirates)." -- Rámon to the group
"I'm sure the soldiers in the hold would appreciate that." -- Julia Frizzell

"Are you going to be a competent merchant captain or a good merchant captain?" -- GM to Rámon
"That crate is depreciating in value in the sun. Move it over there." -- Kendra Jamieson

"You're only one day out so far." -- GM
"Ah, so there's still some alcohol." -- Sean Frost

"Let me give you another acting lesson about merchant ships. They go their way and we go our way, like two ships passing in the night." -- Otto
"But it is day." -- Rámon

"Actually, the merchant ship is steering this way." -- sailor to Rámon and Otto
"They're thinking like Rámon." -- Kris Fazzari
"Now that's scary." -- Sean Frost

"We will soon be seeing some action." -- Rámon
"Will we be involved in it as well?" -- soldiers
"Yes, when the ship begins sinking, and you can't get out of the hold, you'll be involved all right." -- Kris Fazzari

"Oh hey, a crew launcher, there's an idea." -- Eddie to the group

"I am the sixth greatest leader of men on the Spanish Main." -- Rámon to Otto
"This is why there are a lot of pirates in the Spanish Main. Because (the men) are all idiots." -- Kris Fazzari

"I do want some of (the soldiers) not to die immediately." -- Rámon
"Oh, you're so generous." -- GM
"Generosity has nothing to do with it. They're there to protect me!" -- Rámon

"Drop your weapon." -- enemy soldiers
"My father gave me this sword." -- Rámon
"Just so you know, my father gave me a lot of swords." -- Rámon to GM

"Was the crossbowman recruited Jayne-style?" -- GM
"No, I actually chose someone competent." -- Lorianne

"So far, I think this has been a very successful mission. We drew the pirates out, we've set things on fire, and we've managed to lose Rámon." -- Lorianne to the group

"I've always thought I needed a better base. If anything of this island is left standing, I might have to take it over." -- Lorianne to the group

"You hear a bunch of repetitive, grunting noises." -- GM to Marian
"It's not Rámon." -- Sean Frost

"Why doesn't (Rámon) just rub up against someone's shoulder (to get off the blindfold)?" -- Kendra Jamieson
"(He) usually gets slapped for that." -- Sean Frost
"No, someone's shoulder." -- Kendra Jamieson

"Did you guys have bad stuff or something?" -- Kendra Jamieson
"No, we had Rámon." -- Joe Filippini
"What's this Rámon stat?" -- Anne Devlin
"The higher your score, the greater your chance that you actually sleep with (Rámon)." -- Kendra Jamieson

"It's a good thing that sneaking would not be a good plan, since we're not that subtle anyway." -- Lorianne to GM

"Use (Rámon's) head (as your battering ram), it's the hardest part." -- Kendra Jamieson
"And the least valuable." -- Kris Fazzari

"You know, if Rámon were a little more competent, we'd have a Three Musketeers thing going." -- GM to the group

"Let's hope I realize that (our people are) in the sub before I scuttle it." -- Eddie to the group

"So basically, whatever's nearest, (you) club it." -- Kendra Jamieson summarizing Eddie's fighting style

"Friend or foe?" -- Eddie
"How can I tell which side to choose if I do not know which side you're on?" -- Rámon

"We might be right behind you, Rámon." -- Marian to Rámon

"You find yourself surrounded by people pointing swords at you." -- GM
"An even fight, then." -- Rámon

"I keep the levers down, unless I hear a familiar scream." -- Eddie to GM
"That scream you often hear that means your plan isn't working the way you thought it was." -- Sean Frost

"The world came back at the wrong moment." -- Anne Devlin
"On the plus side, this is the cleanest Rámon has been in weeks." -- Sean Frost

"I am thinking this is not such a great ship after all." -- Rámon, referring to the sub
"Why is that?" -- Lorianne
"It leaks." -- Rámon

"Considering how seldom Rámon bathed, I'm wondering how he managed to sleep with the wife of the best soldier on the Spanish Main." -- Kendra Jamieson
"They don't bathe much on the Spanish Main." -- Kris Fazzari
"He just crawled into bed with her and fell asleep." -- Julia Frizzell

"She's still going. I think I'm afraid." -- Kendra Jamieson to the group, as Kris keeps typing in quotes.

"I guess (Eddie) will work on the crew launcher over the interim." -- Wendi Strang-Frost
"You can use Jayne's Sharks to test it." -- Kris Fazzari

Proposed ship names for Bleys' fleet:

"Five Sides to Every Story" by R.F. McCaughey

Cast of Characters

 Anne Devlin:Vialle
 Kris Fazzari:Bleys
 Sean Frost:Fiona
 David Schloss:Random
 Wendi Strang-Frost:Rinaldo

"You wake up in bed. It's dark." -- GM
"Is it my bed? For that matter, who am I?" -- Sean Frost

"Which bits of me bounce when I walk?" -- David Schloss
"The lower, outie bits." -- GM

"What's the name of this game, anyway?" -- Anne Devlin
"We'll figure that out later." -- GM

"I'm naked, aren't I?" -- David Schloss
"That's why the outie bits are bouncing." -- Anne Devlin and Kris Fazzari

"Where is this hallway?" -- Vialle
"Castle Amber." -- servant
"Where is Castle Amber?" -- Vialle
"Around this hallway." -- servant

"When we get our memories back, you're sleeping on the couch." -- Random to Vialle

"OK, I'm going to stab the first guy." -- Fiona
"Any particular way?" -- GM
"With the pointy end?" -- Fiona

Kris' home page | Kris' RPG page

Counter  Hellriders have passed through here since October 1, 1999.

Done by Kris Fazzari.

Quotes taken by myself, Julia Frizzell, Alan Glover and Michael Schloss.

Last modified on April 14, 2009 by Kris Fazzari.

Made with