Next day.... After I finished cleaving the mace, I walked the Pattern (for practice) and took myself outside Sandr's room. I wanted to see if he was ok, and safe, etc... I found an interesting thing (the crowbar, engraved most beautifully with Sandr's name and all kinds of heart and flowers and stuff), which made me laugh loud and long. I took it with me and when in search of Sandr-- who conveniently forced a trump contact, and then forced his will on me to do his bidding! I cannot express how infuriated I was, though I think I got my own when I attempted to brain him later. I don't really want to talk about the incedent; suffice it to say, when I finally caught up with Sandr and Ulysses, they were rude and annoying, and deserved far worse than what they got, which wasn't much, with me being fatigued from walking the Pattern twice in one day (the second time to find the two imbeciles). Ulysses is stronger than he looks... At any rate, I left them in one of Ulysses' god-awful garish shadows and stalked off through shadow to "find" Sequence, who got separated from me in the melee. I walked around a lake a few times until it took on normal colors, and then decided that the Lady of the Lake should give me Sequence... I've often thought that the Lady was a kinder version of Fiona, and it did me some good. I trumped back to Amber, and went to see Mother, which did me no good. I decided to go practice with Sequence, and take out my aggressions towards the freckled little mage-boy and his brainless companion by hacking apart a few dummies. Archimedes came in. I stared hard at him for a while, and finally he acknowledged me, and I suggested a fight. He looked intrigued at this notion, then surprised when I began to speak with Sequence. The fight cleared my brain, which was necessary; really, I think Mother overlooks the finer things that go along with physical exercise. Everything is cerebral with her, and granted she's the best around, but the fact is, she often looks like she could do with a bit of hand to hand combat to make things a little more basic for her. Oh, well... Archimedes was probably holding back, or else his reputation is overblown. I've fought with Kalyn though, and I've talked with him some, too... Kalyn wouldn't say Archimedes is better than he is, so I'm inclined to believe that the Crown Prince was holding back... testing me, perhaps? Hard to say. He tried a little rough-housing, but apparently decided this wasn't going to work; he tried some interesting stuff by letting Sequence slide off his blade, mainly so Sequence wouldn't cut his blade in half, I think. At one point I drew blood, and I'm fairly sure this was on purpose, because I don't think he could be that careless! I was surprised, asked if he was ok, and we went on. Then he started talking to Sequence, who was not helping things at all, for he was babbling about "the noises you make when you see a man you like." This was very discomfiting, for a variety of reasons... I lived with Elizabeth for years, and also took a lot of science and psych courses at university, so I'm fairly aware of sexuality... and yet I'm not. I've only had the one "affair", and Sequence *knows* how that ended, since it was with Sequence that I killed the turncoat bastard. Sequence knows far too much, actually, and I am wondering what the sword was trying to prove.... I wonder also if Sequence really does know what kind of man I'm attracted to. If so, the blade knows more than I... At any rate, while Sequence and Archimedes kept up this most uncomfortable bantering, I get flustered and a bit disturbed, and lose my advantage and focus... and Archimedes hooks my ankle and I'm down. I lay there for a minute and feel tired, then accept his help up, thank him, ask him if maybe we could do this again sometime (to which he was non-commital at best) and loped off to bed. I hung Sequence on the wall by the door (I no longer sleep with it-- just a dagger under the pillow, to keep in the habit of "neat sleeping"-- ie sleeping such that you are aware enough of the weapon in bed with you that you won't wound yourself or forget it's there should a crisis arise...), and got ready for bed. I was planning what I would do on the morrow, and considering Mother's words about fatigue as a danger of Pattern walking, when a knock came at the door. It was the taciturn Chaosite, Jubal. How odd, I thought, and looked nervously towards Sequence, who was also playing it silent. Well, three could play at this game, I decided, and didn't say much. Jubal, in more words than I'd ever heard him speak, told me that trust was a delicate thing, and that he had kind of thrown it at me the other day when he walked the Pattern in front of me. I'm not sure if the scene he enacted was a bribe or a way of saying thankyou, and I'm not sure I'll ever know... Anyhow, he offered me strawberries (my favorite fruit) and then cut his finger on a silver platter and played his flute to make the blood *dance*! It was very, very odd. After he had done, I recalled his words on trust, and wondered if maybe he thought I was worthy of trust because I seemed weak or at least non-threatening. I had almost made a mistake like that with Sandr. I did in fact trust the little mage with some important things, and they paid off, to a point. But he never returned the trust enough to believe I might know better than him about his danger. I have to rethink that entire relationship, I guess... And then I gave Jubal some advice, and decided to follow it myself. I noted that I had a knife in the same shape of his flute-- a forked dirk. Very handy little weapon, I killed the sixth wizard with it, though I didn't burden Jubal with this info-- it would have distracted from my point. I showed the dirk to Jubal, and then put it away and drew out the triangular assassination blade that I had taken off the Egyptian assassin who tried to kill me with it in Foil, before the war. I don't know how clear I was at this point; I was extremely tired, and drowsy from a hot bath. I tried to tell Jubal how I'd aquired this weapon in shadow, which is reputed to be a dangerous place, but that I had kept it all these years to remind me that Amber was even more dangerous. In shadow, I had disarmed the assassin and killed him with his own blade; in Amber, such a thing would be much less likely. I told him to be very careful who to trust... I put the blade away, and Jubal left. I went to bed and slept. I was exhausted, and my sleep was plagued, thanks to my talkative sword and Archimedes' enquiring mind, by images of Calamus and all the times blood had been spilt between us until I finally killed him... I finally fell into a deep sleep, and woke up a bit more refreshed, though not completely... a nap in the sun ought to do something. I refreshed my spells, dropped one or two, added a few others. I'm still clinging to my "boil cerebral fluid" spell, which is probably silly, since Sandr told Chaos about it when he tried it on his enemy, and told Amber about it when he was resisting all attempts to be debriefed. I went to breakfast, which just served to make me madder at the twosome; Caine was an ass to me, but I pretended I didn't realize this, since he's the kind of idiot who wants the victim to be in on the joke most of the time; Sandr alienated some more of the family. After that wretched meal, I went in search of paints, and since Mother was not at home, I borrowed them from Bleys. I went down to the Pattern room and began with my attempt to convert the flat, planar geometry of the Pattern to the spherical geometry of the mace using Bleys' paints. Jubal was there. He asked me a question or two, and then asked me to watch his flute (stench o' Chaos) while he walked the Pattern. I told it not to bite me, so I wouldn't have to cleave it in half. I watched Jubal, painting the Pattern as he took each step. He made it to the center, going through a variety of shapes along the way, and then fell unconscious in the center, reverting back to his real shape. I was concerned, and told Sequence to watch the flute (who knows what it might get up to?) and Trumped Mother; I told her what was happening, and asked her if I should go get him. She thought I should leave him to come around on his own, and not to bother her until it's been a few days. Then she reminded me that walking the Pattern too much would make me tired, and a tired Pattern-walker is a dead Pattern-walker. Not long after this, he woke up; I asked if he was ok, and he informed me his head hurt, please don't yell... I whispered if he were ok, and he said yes, and eventually disappeared. I take that to mean he went somewhere to lie down or something, so I'm not going to worry too much about it. He's an odd person, nice enough, if a bit quiet, but it's not like I'm going to go ahead and trust another stranger real readily. I'm not particularly pleased with how the mace looks, but it's not terrible. I'm going to sand it off and start over, after I've drawn the Pattern flat a few more times... Oh, at least ten. And after I can get Sequence to draw the Pattern in the air perfectly a few times. I think I can work up a spell that would allow Sequence to emit a trace of light when I move the tip. I would like to be able to someday trace the Pattern in the air so fast that one can get the impression of the Pattern hanging in midair for an instant. That would be ideal... So, after a few practice drawings, I'm off for a nap in the sun... To dream about the Pattern, no doubt.