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The question "Why marry?” is indeed an important one to consider
before you choose your future spouse. You may be especially curious to answer
this question after reading some of articles that suggest that not many women of
our class are likely to be lucky enough to marry for love 34
, although
this notion has become more popular as our century has progressed.35
It is indeed true that is it
more difficult for women of our elevated social standing to marry for love than
women of the middling sort, since our parents seek to maintain and increase the
family wealth and social position. 36 If we reminisce with With this in mind, it is now appropriate to consider some other very attractive reasons to marry. These reasons will probably be read to you in some form at your own wedding service. 39 1) “..the procreation of children, to be brought up in the fear and nurture of the Lord, and praise of God. 2) “A remedy to prevent sin, and to avoid fornication” 3) “for the mutual society, help, and comfort, that the one ought to have for the other” Let’s consider each of these very good reasons in closer detail. Just think what a wonderful opportunity we could have as married women, to bear children, and raise them into the type of citizens that will further strengthen both England’s moral strength and economic prosperity. 40 Another important reason to bear children in marriage is that they will carry on their father’s prestigious name Just as raising God-fearing children strengthens our nation’s moral character, marriage itself is widely thought to have the ability to make our nation more morally sound, as it encourages men to avoid certain illicit sexual activities.41 To put this as discreetly as possible, it is perhaps most appropriate to consider this idea by examining the words of Richard Baxter from the very beginning of our century: “it fareth with married men for the most part, as with those that at great charges wall in ground and plant, who cheaper might have eaten melons elsewhere than in their own garden’s cucumber.”42 The third reason listed above is especially important to consider, as an alternative for marrying for passionate love alone. A very personally fulfilling union can be formed by a man and a woman that simply enjoy one another’s company, and can provide comfort and support for one another through both the happy difficult times in life. God provided us with this model of companionate marriage in the story of Adam and Eve : "it is not good that man should be alone. I will make an help meet for him.”43 My fellow gentlewomen, keeping these reasons in mind, we can conclude with saying that while our emotional attachment to our future spouse is indeed important, we should consider the practical difficulties involved in such a union, and remember that a companionate marriage is at least as emotionally fulfilling than a marriage based on passionate love, and probably even more so. We need to look for a spouse that we can imagine ourselves living with in both psychological and material comfort. 44 We must also remember that marriage is a necessity for us upper-class women. Without a proper marriage with which both sets of parents agree, your family relationship could suffer to some degree. Please take precaution as you enter marriage. Hopefully you can now begin to answer that important question: “Why marry”, and can feel more relaxed and confident about choosing the spouse who is right for you |
Will you be lucky in love? To find out, visit the "Bridal
Scopes" to read your very own horoscope!
This site was completed December 08, 2000, at the University of Michigan. |
Any Questions? E-mail: englishbride@umich.edu |