scroll and 
	quill "Outrageous Fortune" quotes
Sessions 100-109
scroll and 
	quill

Session 100

"You don't have to forget very much for all the progress that I've made to be undone." -- Alex to Teresa

"Well, you'll never catch me with my mouth closed." -- Laughter to Mandor

"Don't make me remind you how to talk to your father." -- Gérard
"In Thari?" -- Felix

"Felix, you know what I want. Give it to me." -- Gérard to Felix

"I've got lots of confidence. Brains, maybe not." -- Vixen to GM
"You'll fit in with us just fine." -- Merrie

"Being torn apart by dogs would not be conducive to your plan succeeding." -- GM to Vixen

"I thought you were an atheist?" -- Kris
"I was. Then I got in this coach." -- Jen

"They've actually supplied you with a means of dealing with your waste." -- GM to Alex
"Keen, never take it out!" -- Merrie

"(Tamaryn) takes your hand and leads you to the bedroom." -- GM
"I'll be led." -- Felix
"Shouldn't that be laid?" -- Merrie

"You're never too young for incest." -- Sean to the group

"Hary pretty much picks (Iseult) up and holds her there until the fit stops, and then puts her down." -- GM
"That's OK, that's what Foster does with me." -- Laughter

"How about some food?" -- Vixen
"(Rinaldo) offers you his arm." -- GM
"I don't take a bite, because I'm too polite." -- Vixen

"You always die from the last, biggest, stupidest thing you ever did." -- Laughter to Fiona

"I'm going to like your sister." -- Ariana
"Well, you're not touching her. I'm sorry, my best friend can't sleep with my sister. My mind would blow up." -- Laughter
"It would be a small explosion." -- Sean


Session 101

"The title of the game is 'Distant Thunder.'" -- GM
"That just means that the lightning isn't going to hit our heads yet." -- Merrie

"I have a lead. Would you like to come through?" -- Alex
"As long as there's nothing nasty prepared for me when I arrive." -- Teresa
"Hmm. I hadn't planned anything. I could if you like." -- Alex

"(Teresa) has the air of plotting against you, but you don't know why." -- GM
"Does she have the air of plotting against her brother?" -- Laughter
"Yes." -- GM
"Well, that's OK, then." -- Laughter

"What's the good of being who I am, if I'm just not any good at what I do?" -- Laughter to Drumm
"You're just not good at anything useful." -- Matt

"What were you doing in Foil?" -- Ariana
"We were hunting Drumm in a neutral fashion." -- Laughter

"I wanted to help, until I remembered that I wasn't a genocide." -- Laughter to GM

"It's one thing to take (Brand's) money, it's another to give him blood. On the other hand, I'm real tired of being naked." -- Vixen to the group

"What can I do for you?" -- Felix
"Well, I had a thought." -- Laughter
"Good for you?" -- Felix

"I've just been dumped in garbage by Teresa, I'm going to go kick Eris' ass." -- Laughter to GM

"(Eric's) bonding with his son, no one wants to interrupt him." -- GM
"No one wants to see it, there's a difference." -- Laughter

"I just make big eyes, look stupid, and giggle. Which is easy, since I have no idea what I'm doing." -- Vixen to GM

"I don't know what I'm doing, but I figure I'm being very distracting." -- Vixen to GM

"What else is (Foster) going say? That he sleeps with dead dragons? That he likes food in the wrong sort of way?" -- Felix to Tamaryn


Session 102

"Well, I got through the first two things on my to-do list. Survive meeting Brand. Seduce Rinaldo." -- Vixen to GM

"Other than severe resistance, is there any other pattern to the direction I was going?" -- Usires to GM

"It was a mean and spiteful thing, that I should have outgrown a long time ago." -- Eris
"Well, you're an Amberite..." -- Laughter

"You know, if I were Queen, I'd be opening up universities, brothels, casinos..." -- Laughter to the group

"It's probably beneath your dignity to talk to a rabbit, after all." -- Laughter
"I was not aware that my position came with dignity." -- Bart
"Well, the rabbit's certainly doesn't." -- Laughter

"There's not much difference between a waking death and a sleeping one." -- Vixen to Lucien

"(Kimdyl's) guards were dispatched as well." -- Felix
"Does this sort of thing happen often?" -- Ronan
"Well, we had a good track record until recently." -- Felix

"You can always trust a man with pleats." -- Ronan to Felix

"I'm slow but amiable." -- Felix to the group

"Wow, I was almost effective this session." -- Merrie to the group


Session 103

"Did (Alex) get in trouble?" -- Merrie
"Wait, this is Alex, of course he got in trouble." -- Kris

"Oh, you're an assassin, is it? At least you have a job." -- Ronan to Vixen

"(Laughter) slept with her brother and then killed him. It's such an Amberite thing to do." -- Kris
"It's not like it was the same week or anything." -- Merrie

"My to-do list: 1) Get out of jail free. 3) Walk the Pattern. Number two's going to be a bit tricky. Get my body under control." -- Vixen to the group

"One kick for every hurt." -- Dead Oaks
"Well, be sure to tell me when it starts hurting." -- Laughter

"You know how Foster loves children, and Driscoll does too." -- GM
"Yeah. I don't see either of them offering to blow one out of their left nostril." -- Laughter

"Just be thankful that we were spared growing up with each other." -- Teresa
"Daily." -- Alex

"Where's the war?" -- maiden to Usires
"In my pants." -- Merrie

"Gee, I always get bitten by gentlemen vampires." -- Ariana to the group

"That's how you summon the rings." -- Teresa
"All of them?" -- Reeshau
"One at a time." -- Teresa
"We're going to run out of fingers." -- Reeshau

"What are you talking about?" -- Bill Roth
"Bigamy, but without all the bad connotations." -- Laughter

"Go to the fucking kitchen!" -- the group to Usires, while he's wandering around Brand's castle

"(Alex doesn't) want to be the father of (Vixen's) puppies?" -- Jen to Matt


Session 104

"Nicholas won't let me play with one of the jewels unless you watch." -- Laughter to Random

"You're not really Brand in disguise, right?" -- Laughter to Fiona

"I don't think genocide is a felony." -- Laughter to GM

"I don't think they're going to give me the Jewel of Judgment." -- Laughter to the group
"First you'd have to display some." -- Sean

"So Laughter's like Cthulu. In talking to her, you lose sanity points." -- Merrie to the group

"Did Brand show up? Because I was going to kill him, see?" -- Laughter to GM

"I see you've recovered yourself." -- Vixen
"Yes. Almost." -- Alex, while pulling his pants up

"Well, until recently, I was a fox myself." -- Vixen to Alex

"Vixen is going to be nice and friendly. In other words, she's going to mask her natural personality." -- Vixen to GM

"Your Majesty, don't joke about that, A, and B, tell me that you're joking!" -- Laughter to Nicholas

"I have thought up an apt punishment. You get to plan the wedding with Bartholomew." -- Nicholas
"I'm not marrying Bartholomew!" -- Laughter

"Good morning, your Eminence." -- Laughter to Bart
"What is he emitting?" -- Lyss


Session 105

"I know where this is going." -- Kris
"You do not! Well, you might." -- Eric Braun

"I'm not here to compel you to volunteer, I'm just wondering why you sent no one." -- Ronan to Tierney Feldane

"What the hell is a hedge wizard?" -- Eric Braun
"From the same people who brought you the garden weasel." -- Matt

"Everyone's ratting people out." -- GM
"Not me. I don't know anything, see?" -- Laughter

"I'm lunching in my quarters and reading books on pregnancy. With a loaded crossbow." -- Vixen to GM

"My very own brothel. It's a childhood dream." -- Vixen to the group

"It's not my secret to tell." -- Ariana
"They shouldn'ta oughta let you reincarnate out of the species, then." -- Laughter

"(Shard's) on my righteous indignation list. Spawn of the Devil!" -- Ronan
"Am I on it?" -- Vixen
"On it? You made it! The list didn't exist before you!" -- Ronan

"I'm not going to leave you alone with the ultimate predator. You're my midwife." -- Vixen to Ariana

"I only fight enemies, and I have a lot of enemies. I make enemies wherever I go." -- Iseult to Laughter

"How many points did (Shard) pay to be killed?" -- Laughter to GM

"I'm kneeling in the dust of my proto-brothel with a dagger, being pseudo-flirted with by a vampire. I have good stuff!" -- Vixen to GM

"Then the Serpent betrayed (the faeries)." -- Mandor to Laughter
"What a snake." -- Matt

"Would you say no to a dragon?" -- GM to the group
"Ariana would, if it wasn't a dragon she wanted to sleep with." -- Kris

"I am 40. I cannot be spanked." -- Laughter to the group

"It's a nesting instinct. I get pregnant, I build brothels." -- Vixen to the group

"I don't want to torture (Ariana), she's my gynecologist." -- Vixen to GM

"I'm terribly smart sometimes...except when I'm not." -- Laughter to Ariana


Session 106

"I have done nothing." -- Eric Braun
"That's why it's sedition. Otherwise, it would be treason." -- Merrie

"I didn't know anyone was going to read my diary. It's a diary!" -- Eric Braun to the group

"Who has the even pages of this? Oh God, they're on the back!" -- Jen
"I am not alone in the universe!" -- Merrie

"My children can lose (their virginity) with members of the family, like everybody else." -- Laughter to the group

"You find Vixen hard to read." -- GM to Laughter
"Laughter finds books hard to read." -- Liam

"Laughter is ultimately friendly, even when she's trying to kill you." -- Merrie to the group

"(Jamie) misses (Ronan) in the position." -- GM to Eric Braun (one Scot to another)

"Are you on drugs?" -- Robin
"Why?" -- Laughter
"You make no sense." -- Robin
"You'll get used to it." -- Laughter

"I like having Mandor as my dad. It's like having Mr. Burns as my dad. But slightly different." -- Laughter to the group

"(Vivienne's) my sister, I'm allowed to do things like that." -- Felix to Gérard

"Do I die?" -- Laughter
"No." -- GM
"OK." -- Laughter

"So, how much do (the Hellmaids) watch me at night? Can I carve (a Trump) in the wall with my blood?" -- Laughter to GM

"Rice-a-Ronan." -- Merrie
"Wearing that skirt, he would be a San Francisco treat." -- Sean


Session 107

"Yes, (Laughter) walked the Pattern twice in one day. Twice." -- Sean
"(She'd) better not get within ten feet of a sperm." -- Kris

"Hello, I am Dworkin, I am the boyfriend of the Unicorn." -- Matt to the group, pretending to be Dworkin

"Everyone speaks pigeon. It's the most popular bird." -- Merrie to the group

"What are you upset for? (Inspiring guilt) is a major talent." -- Eric Braun
"Because I'm becoming a Jewish mother." -- Liam

"I went to the Ahab school of tactics." -- Laughter to the group
"This is why you keep getting in trouble." -- Sean

"I'm the dad that can't do a thing." -- Felix to GM

"I can't believe my mom is whoring for the Alex-guy." -- Laughter to the group

"Urine makes everything cooler." -- Liam to the group

"(Bleys) is a gentlemen." -- Eric
"He's your brother." -- Vixen

"There are certain areas where Bleys in not a gentleman, my dear." -- Eric to Vixen
"I'd like him to touch those areas." -- Merrie

"There's no sex involved in tea, right?" -- Mebd
"No, only scones." -- Alex

"Hey, now Alex is Laughter's fifth father." -- Matt
"High-fiver man, you have worked your way into this tangled web of sickness." -- Merrie

"I spent the last year being bored in a bad way, so that's not so bad." -- Laughter to Mandor
"You got to masturbate." -- Liam

"I merely took it upon myself..." -- Ronan to the nobles
"To change the entire social structure." -- Jen

"You've just created a civil war, asshole." -- Sean
"Great, I'm in charge of the castle guard, now I have a job to do." -- Ronan

"What do you think of older women?" -- Laughter
"I thought you'd never ask." -- Bart
"No, I want you to seduce my mother." -- Laughter

"Even with your enormous you-know-what, Benedict impresses you." -- GM to Gavin


Session 108

"Picnic with a cub scout group. Call it a giant jamboree." -- Liam to Matt

"I've been considering your words." -- Tierney Feldane
"That's why I said them." -- Ronan

"The champion of the King's security is a little slow on the gossip front." -- Matt to the group

"Stop Trumping me, I can't see where I'm going!" -- Laughter to Felix

"Well, I suppose if one of (the children) does walk the Pattern, it will serve as a splendid reminder to the others." -- Laughter to the group

"Ahab walked the Pattern when he was twelve, and look what happened to him." -- Laughter
"Ahab turned out that way because there was no lifeguard in his gene pool." -- Felix

"(Ronan's trying) to incite a rebellion." -- Sean to the group
"That's not what the guard is for. That's what I'm doing. There's a difference." -- Ronan

"I point out that (Iseult) is too easily goaded by people." -- Laughter
"Oooh, that makes her mad." -- GM

"That's the one thing that I've never understood about your...never mind, it makes complete sense." -- Laughter to Di'ghan

"(Vixen's) a trained assassin, and now she's opening a brothel. This can't lead to anything good." -- Laughter to Alexandra and Gavin

"That's it! I'm going to go open a brothel and invite only Brand." -- Laughter to the group

"(Foster) took me at my word? Wow, I obviously don't have him cowed enough." -- Laughter to GM


Session 109

"Why would the truth matter in Amber, of all places?" -- Matt to the group

"Nicholas wants me to clean this up?" -- Eric, about the crystals
"I've got a spray bottle." -- Felix

"Well, the nobles were all whiny and said, 'No, I don't want to be part of your guard,' so I went to the disenfranchised and offered them a place in Amber." -- Eric Braun
"Cool! That's how Laughter assembled part of her diplomatic staff!" -- Merrie

"Everyone else seems to have taken over this investigation." -- Vixen to the group
"And we'll prove that we're far more incompetent than you ever dreamed!" -- Merrie

"Felix, Benedict and Bartholomew are our emissaries to Avalon." -- Nicholas to ?
"There's no gunpowder there, so we think you'll be safe." -- Matt

"Where are all my points? (Laughter) doesn't have any useful abilities, skills or attributes." -- Merrie
"They're in (her) parents." -- Matt

"I want to be the mother of a new race." -- George to the group

"You're Gilligan." -- Sean
"Obviously!" -- Liam

"The penises can build large barns and stuff!" -- Sean
"Just like the Amish." -- Eric Braun

"Did you know about my mother?" -- Alex
"No, Eric never told me. I did not, in fact, know you had a mother. " -- Vixen


OF Unicorn
"Outrageous Fortune"
Quotes table of contents
Previous quotes page | Next quotes page


Done by Kris Fazzari.

Last modified on September 13, 1998 by Kris Fazzari.