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MESSAGE BOARD Archive October 2004

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Friday, October 29, 2004 -- 00:35:02 (EDT)
Name: Sally
Location: Seattle, WA
  • I just love reading the new additions to the Simon Says page. Some are amusing; some are heartrenching; some bring back memories (pancakes); some teach me new things about Simon. I hope that going through them and posting them is a helpful part of this long process called grief.
    Think of you every day...
    love, Sally

    Thursday, October 28, 2004 -- 23:34:38 (EDT)
    Name: jane bishop -- Email:
    Location: Ann Arbor, MI
  • Dear Mary, Marcus, and Miriam,
    I love the new picture of Miriam and Simon, even if it is from 2002! Mary, your entries continue to show the same love and devotion that we have seen since Simon first became ill. You are walking all of us down the path of mourning, each in our own way. I printed the picture of Simon on the poster from the Business School gathering, and have it posted above my computer. In that picture I imagine that Simon is pointing the way to some farflung galaxy! He surely would have been thrilled at that magnificent lumar eclipse last night. Miriam, I bet you are thrilled about having a visit from San and Laz. I wish I could be there with you to hear them do their thing!
    Love to all, Jane

    Saturday, October 23, 2004 -- 08:50:02 (EDT)
    Name: Lee Williams -- Email:
  • Mary and Markus, I have been away from the computer for quite a while and it was good to come home and read the web site and know you are continuing to stay in touch about your lives after Simon. Am so glad you are going to a grief support group. I was sorting pictures (so many and have them in boxes til I decide how to orgranize for four kids) and came across some wonderful pictures of Simon with his cousins at Crystal Lake - so full of life and loving the water. That is my fondest memory of him. The poem : Simon's Song brought tears to my eyes but a joyful way to remember him also. I think often of that special memorial service and gathering and your strength through it all. Think of you often..much love, Lee

    Saturday, October 23, 2004 -- 06:40:13 (EDT)
    Name: Dotty Seiter -- Email:
    Location: Hamilton, MA USA
  • What a magnificent gift to wake up this morning to Simon and Miriam's radiant faces beaming from Simon's Place! The sun hasn't even risen yet, but already my day is filled with color and warmth!

    I am so grateful that Simon's Place continues to be live, that you plan to keep the site going in perpetuity, that this is one place I can tap into Simon's life energy again and again.


    Tuesday, October 19, 2004 -- 16:22:40 (EDT)
    Name: Jacqui Shambaugh -- Email:
    Location: Oakton, VA
  • From my Emily to Miriam: what do you call 2 banana peels? A pair of slippers! And 2 spatulas? A pair of flippers! (Em made the second one up while she and George made pancakes.)

    Mary, it's so good to hear from you and to know that you all are slowly finding your way forward. I'm very glad you're benefitting from the bereavement counseling. Its something I never had as a child when I lost my mother... so I wound up doing it as an adult! ("Pay me now, pay me - more - later," I've been told!) I found it very helpful and hope you do, too.

    All the best to you. I hope we get to meet up fact-to-face sometime - I'd love to give you a huge hug and chat. Keep in mind that we're not very far from the new Air and Space Museum Annex (with a Concorde and space shuttle!), nor the new American Indian museum... (Trying to make a trip to DC sound enticing is especially hard in an election year!)

    Lots of love,


    Sunday, October 17, 2004 -- 23:28:49 (EDT)
    Name: Ann Craig a.k.a. Grann -- Email:
    Location: Oberlin, OH
  • There are many daily events that make us think of Simon. Yesterday I drove by the Appolo Theater in downtown Oberlin and noted on the marquee, "Shark Tale." My instant thought was that Simon would have liked seeing that one. Then this morning as I reached for a grapefruit to fix for breakfast, I remembered how Simon relished grapefruit. After downing all the lucious sections, he would pick up the grapefruit half, squeeze it and slurp the juice right into his mouth. His family was well trained to wash his fruit first so it was safe as well as efficient. Out at dinner the other night, the waitress offered a list of desserts. Norm quickly remembered Simon singing the song about the child who asked to hear all the flavors of ice cream and then ordered vanilla. So many memories, such a vital child!

    Sunday, October 17, 2004 -- 23:27:39 (EDT)
    Name: Rebecca Cross
    Location: Oberlin, OH
  • Dear Markus, Mary and Miriam,

    I certainly have enjoyed the funny conversations with Miriam-the-birthday-girl in the past couple of weeks! The first time, I called when she and Markus were making her birthday cake, and I heard her plans for her party (balloons! a clown!). I also reminded her that she and Emma shared a birthdate. When she didn't hand the phone to Markus after she and I spoke, I redialed. "What are YOU calling for again?" she exclaimed. I really laughed! and then enjoyed a brief chat with the father-fellow-baker!

    So tonight I just wanted to send a message to you all. I had a lovely visit with Ann on Friday morning. It's always good to see and hug her and Norm - it feels like I can connect to you through them.

    We continue to remember Simon, to hold him and all of you in our hearts. Ann brought a program to us from Simon's memorial service; so much love and compassion in that event...everyone enlisting the best of themselves that they could imagine in order to remember together our sweet angel boy. Even those of us who were not there in body, were there in spirit.

    Thank you for guiding all of us who care for you, and who loved Simon so much, through this painful and complicated forest, whose markers now are memories as well as light-filled wishes for the future.

    love and more love,
    Rebecca, Randy, Emma and Schuyler

    Tuesday, October 12, 2004 -- 08:50:48 (EDT)
    Name: amy -- Email:
    Location: ann arbor, mi
  • Mary: Thanks for sharing your poignant remarks on the 2 month anniversary of Simon's loss.

    Do you remember that when we released our tadpoles-turned-to-frogs in Simon's honor, I remarked that I hadn't seen a frog in the wild for perhaps 20 years, but that frogs would be our family symbol for remembering Simon? Well, believe it or not, in the past 2 months, we've seen 3 frogs in the wild! One was at Matthei--the kids found one hopping in the fountain. The second was last month while visiting with some friends at a favorite park in our old stomping grounds in Maryland. The kids found a frog hopping around our picnic table. Then, this weekend, my niece found one while we were mini-golfing in myrtle beach! So, Simon is surely present in our lives and our travels. Hugs to you--


    Saturday, October 09, 2004 -- 14:38:47 (EDT)
    Name: Dinorah Curkendall -- Email:
    Location: Denver, Colorado
  • Dearest Mary, Markus and Miriam: Where to find the words to describe the awsome journey that Simon and you guys went through? Nobody can explain how much you had to deal with, and where you got the strength from, to give Simon all the love and support he always had, and at the same time to hold there for him, smiling and being optimistic at all times. There are no words to describe the inmense loss that this tragedy had left in all who loved and cared about your beautiful boy. Thank you very much for showing us the power of love, in times when love is so necessary in our world. Our hearts and thoughts are with you; Real Heros, wonderful parents for Simon and Miriam. We love you all always! We will always love you dearest Simon! The Curkendall's.

    Thursday, October 07, 2004 -- 23:32:36 (EDT)
    Name: Kris Hopkins -- Email:
    Location: Clinton, NY
  • Mary, I found your last entry for September really touching. To me it was such a clear reminder that whereas we used to write about the "hard work of fighting cancer," there's now the "hard work of grieving"....

    Grief can be a constant ache in the innermost depths of our being, or it can come and go at odd moments, called forth sometimes by specific events or situations, and other times seemingly by nothing in particular ... or even nothing at all. And as I'm sure you're discovering, everyone -- even within a family of people who are close and otherwise in synch with one another -- grieves in a different way and at a different "pace." I guess it's part of what makes each of us unique....

    But I hope it helps to soften the sometimes-sharp edges of your pain, at least a bit, to know there are still hundreds of people thinking about you and wishing you the continued strength to bear the burden of your heartache. The work you're doing through Simon's Fund will surely help, too. As difficult as it must be to acknowlege the reason for the fund, I'm sure it's also gratifying to see those plans coming together in such a good and positive way.

    Take care,

    Sunday, October 03, 2004 -- 17:22:23 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • Hi Kathy and Rachael (and other parents of grade-schoolers),

    I love the idea of your children finding ways to think about and draw about Simon for their Reflections. If you can think of a way to get the artwork to me, I'd be delighted to put it up on the Web site.


    Sunday, October 03, 2004 -- 09:03:01 (EDT)
    Name: Dotty Seiter -- Email:
    Location: Hamilton, MA USA
  • Miriam,

    1. At the quack of dawn.

    2. When the alarm cluck rings.

    Love to all,

    Friday, October 01, 2004 -- 18:44:26 (EDT)
    Name: kathy duderstadt -- Email:
    Location: san antonio, tx
  • Dear Rachael and Maggie...

    Marina's drawing two years ago for the Reflections project was a poster about Simon...I'll have to dig it up and find out what the theme was.

    She didn't win any award but it was very sweet...

    Good luck!!!!!! What a great idea for this year's theme!!!!!


    Friday, October 01, 2004 -- 15:58:55 (EDT)
    Name: Dotty Seiter -- Email:
    Location: Hamilton, MA USA
  • Miriam,

    1. When do ducks wake up?

    2. When do hens wake up?

    Answers soon.



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