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Thursday, September 30, 2004 -- 22:58:07 (EDT)
Name: Rachael Coleman -- Email:
Location: SLC, UT
  • Maggie just brought me her National PTA Reflections Program application for this year. This year's theme is "A Different Kind of Hero". She said she knows exactly what her entry is going to be. She's drawing a picture of Simon.

    Thursday, September 30, 2004 -- 11:47:11 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • Responding to Kathy Duderstadt's memories of fun in Family Housing when Simon, Marina, Lev, and Isamu were pretty little (2-3 ish).

    I don't remember that time in the pool (maybe it was at Deborah's old place in FH?), but I do remember a romp in a pool on the deck at Isamu's new house on his birthday.

    Yes, Simon had no fear of the big slide. And he loved the tandem slide down by Lev's, especially when it turned into a race.

    Yes, the Eyewitness books, especially "Fish" were huge for a very young Simon. He was still a fan of the videos up to the end of his life. He and I loved to watch nature flicks together.

    Yes, THE toy store. What a blessing it was to have White Rabbit in our backyard. We did play there a lot, and somehow managed, sometimes, not to purchase anything.

    Yes, I remember the snow bunny, and taking Marina and Simon around on sleds. And, later, zipping down our perfect mini-hill by the soccer field with Marek and Lev.

    I have so many great memories of Simon, too. It is important to keep the happy memories alive as I struggle with the hard ones that require repeated attempts at acceptance. The memories that are so hard I scarcely dare feel them.

    There is simply a lot of work for all of us to do as we face our losses and acknowledge both joy and pain.

    Thanks for your help in the process!


    Thursday, September 30, 2004 -- 02:22:59 (EDT)
    Name: Malissa Nesmith -- Email:
    Location: Augusta, Kansas
  • Mary &amp Marcus,
    I found Simon's website in April, 2004, when our 3-year old son, Canon, was diagnosed with neuroblastoma. We spent the month of August at Sloan-Kettering, and the month of September in the Wichita hospital recovering. I had not checked the website since June and my heart is breaking this evening to learn of Simon's passing. We have been in so many similar situations with Canon.

    Your strength and love for Simon is so beautiful. Your family has been such a wonderful example to others, like us, going through this journey. Thank you for what you have done and what you continue to do. God bless you and your family, and may God bless His new, precious angel!

    Wednesday, September 29, 2004 -- 23:34:42 (EDT)
    Name: Kathy Duderstadt -- Email:
    Location: san antonio, tx
  • Do you remember the time that all four of the playgroup kids -- (I think) -- where in a wading pool in back of your or Deborah's house running around having such a great time?

    Do you remember how Simon had no fear of going down the Big Slide?

    Do you rememer the Eyewitness books with the insects and ?

    Do you remembert the toy store (White Rabbit, I believe, where we use to take our kids to play with Thomas the Tank engine.

    Do you remember the snow bunny....

    I have mostly great memories of Simon
    kathy ''

    Wednesday, September 29, 2004 -- 21:14:52 (EDT)
    Name: Cynthia Rockwell -- Email:
    Location: Middletown, CT
  • Dear Mary and family,
    Here I am, editing the Wesleyan magazine class notes, and I read about Simon, your beautiful firstborn, on the day of my firstborn's birthday (20 years ago), who also had neuroblastoma but died after only nine weeks here on earth. I'm thinking of you and sending all good, strong, healing thoughts. It's clear Simon was a beautiful child here and his wonderful spirit continues his work. Wishing you all strength, courage, and enduring love.
    --cynthia r.

    Wednesday, September 29, 2004 -- 14:51:31 (EDT)
    Name: Rachael Coleman -- Email:
    Location: SLC, UT
  • I've been a bit scarce lately, but still check in to see who's around on a regular basis.

    A couple weeks ago my family &amp I traveled to Northern California for a 3-day peace festival including a Guinness Book of World Records drum circle with over 4500 registered participants. I put a link to the Earthdance site behind this post.

    Our first stop was my best friend's in Santa Rosa. I found myself visiting Simon's site from her house. The last time I'd been there I found out Simon had died. I held you all near and carried Simon tucked into a corner of my heart for the weekend that followed. I was going to check in from Rose's, but was overwhelmed. Simon's presence is still an amazingly large force in my life.

    As we gathered for the drum circle there was a prayer for world peace. Afterwards Wavy Gravy spoke and led us through a grounding/centering exercize. He commented on those who had passed and were surely there in spirit...Jerry Garcia, Ken Kesey, Babatundi Olatunji...I whispered "...and Simon, too" to Maggie.

    There was such a carnival atmosphere filled with color, costumes, dancing, giant puppets, a Chinese dragon, and of course drums. A friend of a friend was in his small plane taking pictures from above and said he could feel the rhythm of the drum beats on the wings of his plane. Hopefully a ripple of healing energy went up into the cosmos and also down deep into our Mother Earth. Hopefully we also help bring about balance as the drum circle was poised right on the cusp of the Autumnal Equinox.

    Mostly, I didn't want a whole month to go by without checking in with you all. My life is filled to overflowing with getting back into the school groove with my kids. I'm hoping to find some balance myself.

    (((Mary, Markus and Miriam))) you are rarely far from my thoughts. You all continue to be my real life heroes.

    Much love &amp bright blessings, Rachael

    Monday, September 27, 2004 -- 14:26:20 (EDT)
    Name: Katrina Zook -- Email:
    Location: Laramie, WY
  • Hello Mary,
    I was so glad to hear you found someone with whom to make music. I hope that continues to be a powerful outlet for you. You are setting a wonderful example for Miriam in the process, that art can truly soothe the soul; at times bringing emotion so close to the surface that you can't function and at other times providing quiet comfort, both of which are necessary when dealing with grief. Grief, I found, truly has a life of its own, and music can be a leveler. I continue to think of you and Markus and Miriam each day. Love, Katrina

    Monday, September 27, 2004 -- 00:42:40 (EDT)
    Name: Annette
  • Mary,

    It's nice to read your posts and feel somewhat connected to the process. I liked Sally's point about "Grief doing you", makes more sense to me. I guess one has to again, like with childbirth give up one's sense of control and go with it where it takes you - mainly to a place unknown and often painful. I know how challenging that can be in birth and can only imagine how even more challenging in death. We think of you all often. Hope you got the photos from our hike. I love Miriam claiming the rock at the top of the first big hill.



    Sunday, September 26, 2004 -- 19:55:51 (EDT)
    Name: Marta, Paul and Sam -- Email:
    Location: Ann Arbor, MI
  • Dear Mary, Markus and Miriam,

    Happy Birthday to Miriam! It is surprising to me how one's perspective changes - you write about Miriam turning 5 as if that is a lot of years, and I remember when Sam became 5 I felt just that way. Now that he is 15, 5 seems young, and I remember Miriam when I last saw her - how long ago? - I'm not sure, but I think she was not quite 4, and she seemed so much of a person, so big, all curiousity and vibrancy and curls, I am surprised to be reminded she is "only" 5 now. We think of Simon as big too, someone whose presence was so definite and particular and unlike any other. Even though we mostly knew him long distance we find ourselves thinking of him so often and being surprised that somehow the rest of us go on without his immediate presence. It was very nice to come back to the site, like visiting an old friend, and get caught up on your thoughts and doings. Our hearts remain with you.

    Marta, Paul and Sam

    Sunday, September 26, 2004 -- 11:51:18 (EDT)
    Name: Anne and Katrin Kleinert -- Email:
    Location: Karlsruhe and Munich, Germany
  • Liebe Mary, Markus und Miriam,

    es tut uns sehr leid um den Tod von eurem lieben Simon, den wir leider gar nicht kennen gelernt haben. Wir wünschen euch, dass ihr auch diese schwere Zeit gut übersteht, nachdem ihr so lange mit ihm zusammen gekämpft habt.

    Nach den vielen Jahren (seit Karlsruhe 199?) würden wir uns sehr über ein Wiedersehen freuen!

    Alles Liebe an euch drei, eure Anne und Katrin

    Wednesday, September 22, 2004 -- 19:47:43 (EDT)
    Name: Kris Hopkins -- Email:
    Location: Clinton, NY
  • Mary, thanks for the tip on "Angelita's Magic Yarn" -- we'll have to see if our library has or can get that one! And if you haven't already read it, another book that Miriam might enjoy is "Abuela's Weave" --,2,2,B/frameset&ampFF=tabuelas+weave&amp1,1,/indexsort=- My mom gave it to Emily a number of years ago; and to me it, too, has a somewhat magical quality about it -- the little girl in the story, whose grandmother has taught her how to weave (with bright colors, which is what made me think of it), feels a bit nervous in the middle of the book, having to face a difficult situation by herself. But Miriam might be glad to know that the little girl is very brave, and everything turns out OK in the end.

    And speaking of Miriam -- HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Turning 5 is such a big thing, isn't it? There are so many things you can begin to do for yourself -- it's really very exciting. So congratulations, Miriam! Hope you had something really yummy at the Spaghetti Factory, and I hope the evening was very pleasant and comfortable for everyone.

    BTW, I'm very excited that our family will be heading to SLC in early July of next year! We'll be there for the international barbershop harmony convention/contest and will be sure to look you up while we're in town! Maybe Miriam would be willing to play tour guide and tell my guys some of the fun things there are for kids to do in the area. :-)

    Our best to all of you,

    Wednesday, September 22, 2004 -- 10:35:35 (EDT)
    Name: Sally Olson
    Location: Seattle, WA
  • Hi guys. I hope Miriam's birthday was everything she hoped for! Did she get the nail polish I sent?
    I felt your emotions as I read of your plans to go to the Old Spaghetti Factory for dinner. My heart ached a bit. Yet, I think Miriam knows what she needs to do, in her own way. Let us all know how it went.
    A friend of mine said often to me after my father's death: "You don't do grief; grief does you". I think that's what you're experiencing from your description. Please call me if you want to talk, but I know it's sometimes hard to pick up the phone.
    love to you all,

    Tuesday, September 21, 2004 -- 16:55:46 (EDT)
    Name: Lindsay , Lance &amp Andre
    Location: Grand Rapids, MI
  • We are wishing Miriam a fabulous 5th birthday. . .Happy Birthday Miriam!

    It makes me recall her 3rd birthday with enough dress up clothes to outfit the party &amp a very delicious chocolate cake.

    Friday, September 17, 2004 -- 02:40:16 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • Dear Kris,

    I must respond to your mention of a brightly hued yarn. One of Simon's favorite books is called "Angelita's Magic Yarn". He requested it repeatedly during the last bedtime reading sessions he shared with Miriam and me. He knew my passion for yarn and made special note of his favorite yarns in the story. It's a wonderful tale of need and ingenuity and luck.

    I checked Amazon, and the book is listed as out of print, limited availabilty (some used copies are listed). I found a link to a photo of the cover on our local libary's Web site. It's really long and ugly, but you can copy/paste it to see the image (I hope).



    Friday, September 17, 2004 -- 00:04:39 (EDT)
    Name: Kris Hopkins -- Email:
    Location: Clinton, NY
  • Dear Mary, Markus, and Miriam.

    I continue to think about you, and never more so than when I was in Oberlin this past weekend for Alumni Council meetings. There I saw many others who've also been following your difficult journey and wishing you well. I also had the pleasure of running into your parents, Mary. It was so good to see them both and to talk, at least briefly, about all of you and about this incredible community of caring that you've created....

    Throughout the weekend it seemed to me as though your family has somehow become a wonderful and (in honor of Simon I'll term it a) brightly hued yarn that even now continues to knit together people from all over the world. It's becoming, in a sense, a beautiful afghan, spreading love and warmth to all who come in contact with it....

    And, Mary, I echo what others have written here: your words have come to mean a great deal to me, too; and I would urge you, if and when you ever feel ready and able to, to share your thoughts and reflections even more broadly than you have already. There are undoubtedly people beyond SimonsPlace and the NB listserv who would benefit from the honesty,clarity, and sensitivity that you express so eloquently through your writing. I sense that the process and product of writing is therapeutic for you, but what you may not have realized initially is that it can and does provide healing for your "audience" as well -- at least it does for me. So thank you for sharing of yourself so deeply.

    Wishing you peace,

    Thursday, September 16, 2004 -- 14:58:11 (EDT)
    Name: Gisela and Andreas Kleinert -- Email:
    Location: Halle, Sachsen-Anhalt Germany
  • Liebe Mary und Miriam, lieber Markus,

    wir sind mit Euch sehr traurig, daß Simon gestorben ist. Es hat uns sehr berührt, wie der tapfere kleine Bub seine Krankheit ertragen hat - mit wieviel Fröhlichkeit trotz allem!
    Und wir haben auch gesehen, wieviel Kraft der Familie abgefordert wurde. Bewundernswert, wie Ihr diese unglaublich schwere Zeit durchgehalten habt. Nun wird es Euch auch gelingen, langsam Eure innere Ruhe wiederzufinden. Wir wünschen Euch, daß zu der Trauer die Freude kommen wird darüber. daß Ihr dieses wunderbare Kind erlebt habt. Simon war wie ein kleiner Komet, der mit einer leuchtenden Spur plötzlich vom Himmel fällt. Er wird unsichtbar, aber er geht ja nicht verloren.
    Ganz herzliche Grüße
    Eure Gisela und Andreas

    Wednesday, September 15, 2004 -- 00:09:44 (EDT)
    Name: katharine duderstadt -- Email:
    Location: san antonio, tx
  • My kids have gone to bed, the house is clean, and I am taking a bit of time to figure out how I am going to set up an Alex's Lemonade Stand for Marina's Elementary school in one week.

    Marina is Mother Goose (the lead) in a wonderful musical being put on by the second grade called "Lemonade" by John Jacobsen. The moral is "If life gives you lemons....make lemonade!."

    I mentioned the idea of hosting an Alex's Lemonade Stand and the school is very enthusiastic. It's a bit like wildfire and suddenly I'm in charge.

    Wish me luck...

    The school is K-5 and has about 8 classes of 20 student per grade (rather large).

    The latest thought is to skip the lemonade for the sake of the cleaning staff and just go for the fundraising and children's involvement. Perhaps paper lemons and such with the kids writing notes along with their donations during the week before the play?

    Any easy quick ideas would be greatly appreciated.

    The play is on October 5th



    I think of Simon daily and the memories of Simon and of the memorial service give some sweetness to the some of the daily sour moments life brings.

    May we all have a sweet year...

    Tuesday, September 14, 2004 -- 16:44:04 (EDT)
    Name: Anne, Tom, and JOhannes -- Email:
    Location: Northfield/South Bend, MN/IN
  • We have been thinking of you in this time of change; your trip to the surrounding areas sounds beautiful and important in so many ways. We were struck by the incredible beauty of the area when we flew in (mountain starved midwesterners that we are now).

    When we light candles for dinner, we've been lighting one for Simon, to brighten his path; Johannes reminds us when we don't! (I-uh eh eh--Simons Kerze). Thank you, Mary, for continuing to keep us updated on your lives. I second Gary's ideas. I've been thinking that your thoughts and your journey would be so helpful to so many people (as they have been for all of us).


    Tuesday, September 14, 2004 -- 00:11:24 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • Gari,

    While we are remembering Simon's sweet hands on that cup, and on all the drums and whistles and gongs, let us also remember his fierce competitiveness for the seat at the head of the snack table! I've forgotten now who his closest rival was. I just remember he often succeeded in being the first one to dash to the chair, and I felt a mix of pride and embarrassment.

    I also remember all the times he didn't want to walk around in the circle for "Bim, bum." And I credit you with teaching me to say, OK, then let's not participate, until you're ready, rather than succumbing to his requests to be carried. Such good lessons.

    And now I am remembering a few times spent reading fun books while he sat on your basement toilet during early days of potty-going.

    I hope your new families absorb the lessons as we did. And people wonder where we learned our parenting skills...


    Monday, September 13, 2004 -- 19:30:58 (EDT)
    Name: Gari Stein
  • As I begin a new session, I reached for the juice cups to add new names and found Simon's blue cup. I have saved it and held it tight, knowing his sweet little hands held it so often in class. It is a sweet reminder of him everyday. Mary your writing is so eloquent. Perhaps you might think about publishing some day and perhaps help other parents with the lessons you have learned. I think of you and Miram, Markus and Anne everyday and send you my love always. Gari

    Monday, September 13, 2004 -- 17:17:56 (EDT)
    Name: Keri A -- Email:
    Location: SLC, Ut
  • Hi Mary

    I don't always express myself as well as I would like. But it is important for me to try. I imagine that the toughest times are yet to come, as the reality of Simon's passing really sets in. The memorial service is over, family has gone home, and life must go on. This will be an intense year for you and your family. I am so thrilled to hear that you are throwing yourself in your music and taking time just for you, Marcus, and Miriam to absorb life. You really are an incredible woman with incredible strength, but even so, you don't have to be strong ALL of the time... I hope you have room to grieve and even show your grief to others at times.

    For what it is worth (coming from an outsider who cannot completely understand at the personal level you do what it means to lose a child), I just want you to know that I care about you and your family, and what you have gone through, what you are still going through. These are my thoughts for today, and I send them with my love.

    Monday, September 13, 2004 -- 16:49:56 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • In direct response to Katrina and Jacqui, I want to let you all know that I've just finished a music session with a new music friend. Elizabeth Ballentyne is a down-the-street neighbor, whom we met when she became one of our many errand helpers this summer. During a casual conversation a week or so after Simon died, she mentioned that she's a pianist. She went to Eastman around the time that Katrina, Jacqui, and I (and several others on this message board) were at Oberlin. That very day, we played through some Brahms songs. Today, we mostly did Mozart. It is a great joy for both of us, especially after long breaks from more active music-making.

    Elizabeth was also the source of soprano Carol Ann Allred, who sang Simon's favorite lullaby so beautifully at our memorial service. Carol and Elizabeth met at Eastman.

    I have known for a while that music will be part of my process of moving forward and healing. We shall see where it all leads.


    Monday, September 13, 2004 -- 14:22:59 (EDT)
    Name: Jacqui Shambaugh -- Email:
    Location: Oakton, VA
  • Dear Mary,
    My sentiments echo Katrina's... I think of you every day and continually admire your ability to do what you must to care for your family and honor Simon's memory. You're a constant inspiration.
    Much love,

    Sunday, September 12, 2004 -- 20:56:18 (EDT)
    Name: Connie Lippert -- Email:
    Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan USA
  • Hello Mary,
    Much love to you and Miriam and Markus. We continue to keep you in our thoughts and prayers and remember Simon when we see blue skies and cool sunny mornings. We are enjoying your writings too, Mary very much. I think of you and your quiet courage and strength. Then my own troubles don't seem so heavy.
    Your Friends,
    Bob and Connie Lippert

    Sunday, September 12, 2004 -- 17:40:24 (EDT)
    Name: Katrina Zook -- Email:
    Location: Laramie, WY
  • Dearest Mary,
    I continue to marvel at your strength and fortitude. I am so drawn to your beautiful writing. As painful as it is to read and try to comprehend what you and your family are going through, it gives me comfort to know your thought processes and activities. Thank you for sharing your gifts. I think about the three of you constantly and I have to trust that Simon's spirit is free and at peace. I find myself reading what you've written and quietly repeating, "Oh, Mary" through my tears. Simon certainly felt your intense love during his life and and surely continues to feel it. All the best my dear friend, as you and Markus and Miriam step into each new day.
    Much love and admiration,

    Friday, September 10, 2004 -- 05:26:44 (EDT)
    Name: Gertraud Brandenburg -- Email:
    Location: Linz, Austria
  • Dear Mrs. and Mr. Vodosek,
    Although I never knew your son personally I followed the history of his illness with great compassion and felt awfully sad when I learned about his death.
    May I offer you my deeply-felt sympathy - having 2 grandchildren of my own (one of them a Simon, born May 17th,2004)I can imagine what the loss must mean to you, especially after such a long time of struggle against the disease.
    Yours sincerely,
    Gertraud Brandenburg

    Thursday, September 09, 2004 -- 20:45:22 (EDT)
    Name: katharine duderstadt
    Location: san antonio, tx
  • Dear Mary and all,

    Thank you, Mary, for sending a message of how you are doing. It means a great deal. I have been checking the site quite a bit.

    Simon was a great kid and it is very difficult that he is gone.

    You should feel free to write more on the site or not to write more.

    We all have our own personal grief for the loss of Simon.

    I would value your writings. You write so beautifully...and express yourself so willingly.

    If hope that others will continue to visit the site in the spirit of Simon.

    Must Go.


    Thursday, September 09, 2004 -- 02:27:57 (EDT)
    Name: Mary Craig -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT United States
  • Thank you, Nancy, for sending the compilation of grief support resources. It's very helpful.

    I remember meeting you and your son, and I think I recall that you live near Liberty Heights Fresh. I tried to email you back with the address provided in your message, but my mail bounced.

    Can you try again to be in touch?--Mary

    Wednesday, September 08, 2004 -- 18:14:03 (EDT)
    Name: Nancy Schmaus -- Email:
    Location: Salt Lake City, UT USA
  • Dear Mary,

    We only met briefly a couple of months ago at PCMC in front of the pharmacy. We exchanged telephone numbers with all intentions of getting together. We live so closely to one another, and our kids both had brain tumors. As you know, taking care of a child with a brain tumor requires so much time. Somehow, neither of us got around to telephoning. You and Simon often came to mind in these intervening months, and then my husband told me about the article in the SLC Tribune. I was so shocked and saddened, and shed many tears for your loss. Your website is so beautiful and shows the loving and supportive parents (and friends) that Simon had throughout his illness. Please know that you are in our thoughts. I have attached some links to various grief websites. Maybe they will be of assistance to you and your family as you deal with Simon's passing.

    With Love,
    Nancy Schmaus (Mom of Jakob, dx 1/2003 w/ grade II astrocytoma)

    1. Compassionate Friends<>

    The Compassionate Friends is a national nonprofit, self-help support
    organization which offers chapter meetings, articles, brochures, sibling
    information and links to families who are grieving the death of a child of any
    age, from any cause.

    2. In Loving Memory<>

    A site founded by parents who lost their only child after a 5 ½ year battle with a brain tumor. This site is for parents who lost their only child or all their children.

    3. Grief Warehouse<>

    Site designed specifically for those who lost their child.

    4. My Parents Are Survivors<>

    Site for moms, dads, grandparents, and sibs- tons of information, poetry and
    links. Interesting stuff on butterfly releases as a memorial.

    5. Bereaved Parents of the USA<>

    Bereaved Parents of the USA (BP/USA) is a nationwide organization designed to
    aid and support bereaved parents and their families who are struggling to
    survive their grief after the death of a child. There are local chapters
    meetings and an online newsletter.

    6. The Centering Corporation<>

    A list of books with short reviews on death and grief.

    7. Children's Lighthouse Memorial<>

    An interesting idea- for $250 you can have your child's name engraved on a stone
    which will be placed at the lighthouse.

    8. Memorial Sites
    Cancer Kids<>

    An organization designed to help tell children's stories by posting personal
    websites. This a way for parents who have developed a memorial website to have
    their site found by others.

    Review 4/14/03

    9. Heavenly Lights Children Memorial<>

    Memorial sites for children who died from childhood diseases and raise

    10. A Place to Honor Grief<>

    A place to write a your story about your child (open to all people who have had a loved one die).

    Saturday, September 04, 2004 -- 15:24:09 (EDT)
    Name: Deanna Misaka RN -- Email:
    Location: SLC , UT
  • I am sorry that I missed Simon's tribute. I was working. Providing what it is that the higher power gave me to give to these special children. Your tribute words to Simon were eloquent. Heartfelt, and much like SImon would have liked, honest, from his mommy's heart. It is my hope for you and your family that the memories of Simon keep you smiling. WIth much respect, Deanna

    Friday, September 03, 2004 -- 10:24:40 (EDT)
    Name: amy -- Email:
  • Dear Mary, Markus and Miriam,

    Buckets of tears and sobs as I got the the end of your beautiful remembrance of Simon--your words inspire me to cherish every moment of my children's journey--especially the annoying, the irritating, and the down-right exasperating ones. Thanks for continuing to bless all of us with your profound gifts.

    Thursday, September 02, 2004 -- 13:42:28 (EDT)
    Name: Kathy Duderstadt -- Email:
    Location: san antonio, tx
  • My daughter's teacher lent me a wonderful book that I wanted to share with anyone who visits this site...

    Tear Soup -- A Recipe for Healing after Loss
    by Pat Schwiebert and ChuckDeKlyen with illustrations by Taylor Bills

    It not only helped me put my own grief over the loss of Simon into context but also has given me a basis with which to interact with the grief of Mary, Markus, Miriam, and other family members and friends close to Simon.

    I find that I can easily project my own feelings onto others and my hope is that the lessons from this book will help me refrain from doing so.


    (I would welcome any other reading suggestions. Mary set out a whole pile of books at the memorial. I wish I had written down the titles).

    Thursday, September 02, 2004 -- 06:46:36 (EDT)
    Name: Claudia Zeymer -- Email:
    Location: Renthendorf, Germany
  • Liebe Mary, lieber Marcus,

    ich war vor 2 Jahren das aupair von Christie Brown und Jerry Davies.
    Und ich hatte das wunderbare Vergnügen Simon kennenzulernen.Er war ein sehr liebes und aufgewecktes Kind.Was ich aber am meisten bewunderte war, wie stark er war und wie lieb ihr ihn behandelt habt.
    Ich wollte euch mein Beileid aussprechen und euch viel Kraft wünschen diese schwere Zeit zu überstehen.Ich bin in Gedanken bei euch.Wenn ich etwas für euch tun kann so lasst es mich wissen.
    In aufrichtiger Anteilnahme, Claudi

    Thursday, September 02, 2004 -- 02:18:03 (EDT)
    Name: Bill Hilton -- Email:
    Location: Sunnyvale, CA United States
  • Dear Mary,
    Though we met only briefly when you joined the Alumni Trustee Search Committee, your family and especially Simon (as I have become acquainted with him through the website and especially through your beautiful "Reflections") have connected with me deeply. I shall not attempt to explain how. Instead, I shall wish for you, Markus, Miriam and all of your extended family, an ongoing celebration of his life--which, your "Reflections" suggest to me, shall be Simon's immortality.

    Wednesday, September 01, 2004 -- 22:22:46 (EDT)
    Name: Kris
    Location: Clinton, NY
  • What a wonderful remembrance you wrote for the memorial service, Mary -- it was absolutely perfect.

    I had the privilege of singing at a wedding on Saturday. The bride was a church friend and former preschool teacher and babysitter for our kids. I thought of that ceremony as being parallel to Simon's in that it, too, was a celebration of life and love.... The only trouble was that the various emotions of both seeing our friend get married and thinking of Simon kind of got tangled up together and made it a little tough to get through Dan Fogelberg's "Longer," especially once I learned from the organist that Fogelberg himself is battling cancer at present.... I'm afraid my conservatory training wasn't very evident that day, but I'm hoping people at least got the message that I was "singing from the heart." (My tears surely provided the first clue! ;-)

    I was indeed thinking of all of you that day, as were so many, many people both within and without Salt Lake City.


    Wednesday, September 01, 2004 -- 21:41:04 (EDT)
    Name: Eileen Drayer -- Email:
    Location: Reynoldsville, PA USA
  • Mary,
    What a wonderful testament to the greatness of a mother's love - I cannot tell you how the much the words made me feel like I knew Simon!
    With love and prayers.

    Wednesday, September 01, 2004 -- 16:05:38 (EDT)
    Name: Michele Zimmerman -- Email:
    Location: Oberlin, OH U.S.
  • Dear Mary,
    I am touched beyond belief at everything I've read at Simon's Place. God bless you all.
    Michele Zimmerman
    (aka Presti, about 1000 years ago!)

    Wednesday, September 01, 2004 -- 13:53:32 (EDT)
    Name: sonja -- Email:
  • Dear Mary and Marcus,
    I have had this on my refrigerator for several years. Perhaps you haven't seen it?
    "Life is eternal,
    And Love is immortal,
    And Death is only a horizen

    And a horizen
    is nothing save the limit of our sight."

    Rossiter Worthington Raymond




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